may's Xanga

Sunday, January 14, 2007

Sun, 14 Jan 2007 13:01:01 GMT

I knew it! There was nothing wrong with my xanga/may. The problem's my pc browser. I'm using my laptop right now and I could log in!! I still have this account! Yipeee!!!

Saturday, October 21, 2006

Sat, 21 Oct 2006 05:16:09 GMT

Life is touch and go. Some will stay only for a while. Others will go away but those who find you special will find ways to stay

weird flarey morning..

Wed, 18 Oct 2006 00:25:03 GMT

Woke up this morning, still with pain in my both knees and somewhere around my arms (dunno exactly what part). I think, this is what they call lupus flare. So, it's a flary morning for me huh? Pain's bearable. I was in bed almost the whole day yesterday. Just got up when I needed to. So i guess it's gonna be the same thing again today. Will have my blood and urine tested again later.

My yahoo email is acting up. Weird weird. My inbox looks like what it looked like decades ago.
And so does my xanga.....what's wrong with xanga today? I am having problems with my editor.....

What's wrong with today?... Yahoo and xanga got lupus too. Bleh!

Monday, October 16, 2006

Mon, 16 Oct 2006 06:30:29 GMT

There's this certain ad that caught my attention that says... "Proven to Shut Off Lupus - Mirac is rheumatologist approved, blood-test proven and stops the production of the cells causing Lupus. Proven to shut down ANA and DS, anti-DNAs causing Lupus."

Knowing that there's no cure for Lupus.( However, it can be controlled.) That word "shut off" definitely made me

curious. So, there....I ended up reading their page (http://www.lupusremedy.com)

A part of there says... I quote..."When taken regularly, Mirac has also shown the ability to stop the production of cells that cause the immune system to attack itself thereby correctin an overactive immune system naturally. "

If this product is 'real', it's amazing to know that such thing exists. It stops the production of cells that cause Lupus, reduce inflammation and pain, and more importantly, it corrects the immune system naturally.

SO...I'm not really sure whether it works effectively,but one thing I'm VERY sure of, the ad defines exactly what Lupus patients needs. We need our immune system to do their work accordingly and not destroy us.

.....For now, am gonna stick to my prescribed drugs, and herbal med. I'm doing fine with my herbal med 'soup'. I take it 2x a day. I still have 3 more packs left. I actually want to recommend it with other lupus patient out there. I was first assessed and been asked questions before 'he' (the specialist "i don't know how to call him')ordered his assistants to prepare the stuff,have it weighed then packed later on.

*starving*

Thursday, October 12, 2006

Thu, 12 Oct 2006 12:04:25 GMT

Went to see my rheumhy today. No blood test. No new meds. My hip x-ray result was fine. My prednisolone is down to 10 mg/day. Yahooo! I would start my Vit. D tomorrow *hopefully*. Haven't told him about me taking this chinese herbal med we bought last weekend. Although mama did ask him if it's okay for me to take any chinese herb med, and he answered yes. The medicine is a mixture of dried stuff (stems,bones, i don't know). I didn't really understand what's it all about but according to my mama's friend, it did a wonderful job to his knee (arhthritis). So there we went last weekend. It was a looooong drive (6-hour-drive *blame it to the heavy traffic*).

Okay, that's it. Got to sleep later....after i play Sudoko. Bwahaha..Am addictied to that game.

Prednisone Weight

Wed, 11 Oct 2006 04:12:20 GMT

I'm not really liking how I look like right now. I have gained almost 10 kgs in just less than 2 months.Bloated face, tummy, and hair loss ("they come and go") Im gonna see my rheum tomorrow. I expect him to cut down my prednisone from 15 to 10 mg/day. I wonder if I could "someday" stop taking this drug? What would happen if I stop taking it? Prednisone is a very good drug. No doubt about it. But everyday I see myself in the mirror, I see a diffierent me. Not that I'm complaining. *as if I have the right to complain* I remember few months back when gaining weight was really the least of my problem. *reminiscing*

I'm being careful with my diet now. Less calorie-low fat diet. I've been having a really healthy-nutritious diet-too much healthy that probably triggers my 'gaining weight". Having a 55-kg weight is such a big thing for someone who used to weigh 45 kg (3 months ago). Okay, 55 kg is probably not that bad, but I wish to have my heart-shaped face back. This is no comment on anyone else who have a round face..But mine isn't even a round face, it looks bloated...edematous. Looks funny.

Don't get me wrong though. Like what I said, I'm not complaining. Just sharing my thoughts. I have more blessings to be thankful for.

Wanna share this too:

Handling Prednisone's Side Effects Naturally.

http://www.pemphigus.org/articles/healthlifestyle/af_prednutrition.html

Thursday, October 05, 2006

Thu, 05 Oct 2006 12:05:53 GMT

Today, I spent most of my day in bed sleeping. Just too tired from yesterday's activity. Yep. I would call that an "activity". Mom-in-law brought me to see her friends who visited me when I was still in the hospital lying "lupus' ly insane..harhar!) Amazingly, I didn't feel tired at all. Exhaustion came a day after.

This evening, Mama went out to do her thing and sis-in-law called up earlier and asked me if I could "babysit" her daughter. She had to work over time. It was fun bathing them and later on ..to sleep. It was like having twins. I felt so normal except this pain in my right leg. Grrrr!

By the way,I'll start taking my Vitamin E tomorrow. I think it's safe for lupus.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Wed, 04 Oct 2006 11:47:40 GMT

" We go round and round and round and round..." (Unknown)

A pill to wake up

A pill to pee

A pill to Poop

A pill for inflammation

A pill for pain

A pill for dizziness

A pill for legs that go bump in the night

A pill to counteract the pills we take

A pill to help our depression over these pills we take

A pill at night to sleep

Like I said.. we go round and round and round and round again!

P Pretty

I Insane

L Life

L Led

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

Tue, 03 Oct 2006 01:37:44 GMT

Got a lupus or know someone who does? Read this. I find it so true.

A letter to be shared with friends and family
by Theresa Stoops in Florida

WHAT YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT ME

My pain - My pain is not your pain. Taking your arthritis medication will not help me. I cannot work my pain out or shake it off. It is not even a pain that stays put. Today it is in my shoulder, but tomorrow it may be in my foot or gone. My pain is not well understood, but it is real.

My fatigue - I am not merely tired. I am often in a severe state of exhaustion. I may want to participate in physical activities, but I can't. Please do not take this personally. If you saw me shopping in the mall yesterday, but I can't help you with yard work today, it isn't because I don't want to. I am, most likely, paying the price for stressing my muscles beyond their capability.

My forgetfulness - Those of us who suffer from it call it brain fog. I may not remember your name, but I do remember you. I may not remember what I promised to do for you, even though you told me just seconds ago. My problem has nothing to do with my age, but may be related to sleep deprivation caused by chronic pain. I do not have a selective memory. On some days, I just don't have any short-term memory at all.

My clumsiness - If I step on your toes or run into you five times in a crowd, I am not purposely targeting you. I do not have the muscle control for that. If you are behind me on the stairs, please be patient. These days, I take life and stairwells one step at a time.

My depression - Yes, there are days when I would rather stay in bed or in the house or die. I have lost count of how many of Dr. Kevorkian's patients suffered from Chronic Pain as well as other related illnesses. Severe, unrelenting pain can cause depression. Your sincere concern and understanding can pull me back from the brink. Your snide remarks can tip me over the edge.

My stress - My body does not handle stress well. If I have to give up my job, work part time, or handle my responsibilities from home, I'm not lazy. Everyday stresses make my symptoms worse and can incapacitate me completely.

My weight - I may be fat or I may be skinny. Either way, it is not by choice. My body is not your body. My ability to control my appetite is broken, and nobody can tell me how to fix it.

My need for therapy - If I get a massage every week, don't envy me. My massage is not your massage. Consider how a massage would feel if that charley horse you had in your leg last week was all over your body. Massaging it out was very painful, but it had to be done. My body is knot- filled. If I can stand the pain, regular massage can help, at least temporarily.

My good days - If you see me smiling and functioning normally, don't assume I am well. I suffer from a chronic pain and fatigue illness with no cure. I can have my good days, weeks, or even months. In fact, the good days are what keep me going.

My uniqueness - Even those who suffer from chronic pain are not alike. That means I may not have all of the problems mentioned above. I do have pain above, below the waist, and on both sides of my body that has lasted for a very long time. I may have migraines, hip pain or shoulder pain, or knee pain, but I do not have exactly the same pain as anyone else. I hope that this helps you understand me,

I have shared these thoughts with many "Lupies", as we call our self, and they agree with me. So when you see someone at the store who gets out of the Handi-cap space and they look fine -- Do not judge them as you may Not know their Inner pain.

Monday, October 02, 2006

Mon, 02 Oct 2006 07:24:23 GMT

Well.......So bored...

I just really have to accept the fact that things aren't just the same anymore. That I wouldn't have the same energy I had before lupus. That I wouldn't be able to play, fly a kite, jump, hop and run with my kid anymore. This is the year that I should be enjoying my 3 1/2 year old kid.

Enuff...I should be happy.I MUST feel happy and blessed instead. Like what positive people say....Life can be most rewarding when we concentrate on a few of the gifts that life provides us rather than by grasping for more.

UPDATE:

Well, I just sent emails to the parents of my former students and to Ms. Cherry (my english supervisor). I just really miss my students as well. I hope they still recognize me.

My former K2A..........*Actually, there were 20 of them...*